Keeping It Real

I've really been thinking about what I want my blog to be, and who I want it to inspire.  For the most part I try my best to keep the content upbeat and inspirational, but sometimes I just need to keep it real, which brings me to today. 

For the past couple of weeks I have been struggling with motivation, specifically lack there of!  I don't have motivation to blog, very little to sew, not wanting to take the time to sit down and work through additional pattern ideas, and the list goes on.  I find myself glued to my computer (reading other people's blogs!), as well as the Food Network (I don't cook, but love watching others create yummy dishes!), instead of doing anything constructive.  I anticipate that this funk (totally borrowed the word from my sweet friend Amanda!) is just a phase, as life within the past year has been nothing I've wanted for myself.  I'm coming up on the last final transition, which technically sets me free, yet gives me great concern for the future.  I'm also coming up on a birthday, which adds stress to my life situation, and all I want at this time in my life is to be wanted, both in my personal life as well as my professional life.

Deep down inside I know that God has a great plan for my life.  Yet sometimes I question it, as I don't think I'm strong enough to deal with everything that has been thrown my way, and that makes me sad.  He knows what He's doing, thus who am I to question his timing and his ways? 

Looks as though I kind of got off on a tangent, but if you have any motivation tricks/ideas/ways, I'd love for you to share them in the comment section, as frankly I'm desperate!

One lat thing before I sign off...I want to share my new ringtone.  Not like my phone rings frequently, but when it does, I enjoy hearing that "this has gotta be the good life".  It always reminds me that I have to take initiative to make this the "good life".

Answered Prayers!

I'm learning that patience is key.  I have to say that I've never been a very patient person.  I've never really had to wait for much, and at times I think I equate patience with boredom as I'd rather be overloaded with work than sit idle.  I've digressed a bit, but I hope you get where I'm coming from.

This past weekend was a BIG weekend for Squirmy Worm Studio.  Friday was the one year anniversary of when I lost my job.  It seems weird to equate an anniversary with unemployment, as its not oh so joyful, but it is what it is.  I really can't believe its been a year.  Sure I've enjoyed hours of Hoda and Kathie Lee (that one's for you Sherri!) and of course my afternoon indulgence of Let's Make A Deal (they give out some awesome prizes!), but I've really spent the majority of my time building my business.  Friday afternoon as I was driving home from the local quilt shop I received an awesome email...a wholesale order for two of my patterns (Diaper Wristlet and Thread Catcher).  Yep, that's right, my patterns are now for sale at Tall Mouse Crafts & Fabric!  :)  Definitely an answered prayer, AND exactly a year from when I was let go!  God has a great plan for my life, and I'm more than happy to be on this ride!

Dreaming Big!

Source: eighteen25.blogspot.com via Candice on Pinterest

I first got behind a sewing machine in fourth grade.  My mom enrolled my sister and I in after school sewing lessons, at the local quilt shop.  Every week we would show up with our sewing basket stock full of supplies, and pattern in hand.  My mom would leave and the teacher, sweet and ever so patient Mrs. Dietz (sp?) would take over.  My wardrobe was full of handmade reversible vests (they were in style- I swear), one-piece pant jump suits, and way too many sunflower printed garments (I wish I had a picture to share with all!). 

You may wonder where I'm going with this walk down memory lane.  Well, with all of my free time (aka, 11 months of unemployment!), on occasion I still wonder what I want to be when I grow up.  I know, I know, I'm 28, with a college degree, and frankly I should already know who I am, and what I'll be doing for the rest of my life, but life happens and interests change.

Lately opening an after school sewing studio for children is on my list of what I want to do.  Having the ability to inspire young girls to be the next generation of quilters and seamstresses would be such an honor!  Opening a brick and mortar quilt shop is always something that's in the back of my head.  In addition, the possibility of being a fabric sales rep has been brought to my attention by my sweet mentor.  Who know what God's plan for my life looks like.  As of now I'm just waiting patiently and trying to make the most out of my free time, as I know when I go back to work my creative time will diminish.

What do you want to be when YOU grow up???  :)

Busy, Busy, Busy

Do you ever get so busy/stressed that you just shut down?  That's where I'm at today.  I have an overflowing 'To-Do List', which involves a lot of sewing, pattern refinement, and decision making.  I want everything that I produce and/or has my name on it to be perfect, although I know that its an impossible feat as I'm an imperfect person, living in an imperfect world- plain and simple.

That's all I have for tonight...I just wanted to get it off my chest.  A new day is just around the corner (2 hours and counting).

Oh, and because posts without a picture are a tad bit boring...even on a bad day (maybe especially on a bad day) this little guy makes me smile from ear to ear!  :)

Curls- 1980's Style!!!

Thank you for all of your sweet comments yesterday regarding my first vlog!  I have to say that I was SO nervous!  The clip I posted was probably the second or third take out of twelve- no kidding!  :)  Some of you mentioned my curls, which got me thinking...

So I raided my momma's scrapbooks and selected a photo (or two) from each year of my early childhood.  I MAY regret this post later, but I hope you enjoy the snapshots of my curly hairstyles (hairstyle might be a stretch!) from 1982 to 1989!  :)  

A little background about my mop (aka curls!)...both of my parents have naturally curly hair + my Grandma M. hoped and prayed that I would have curls, so quite frankly I didn't have much of a chance for straight hair!  :)

First Christmas- December 1982 with Grandma B.

First Birthday- August 1983

Laundry with my Dad (1983)

Halloween- October 1984

Happy big sister- February 1985

Dress up time with Grandma B.- 1985

Preschool- 1986

 

Beach day with Megan and my Dad- 1987

Easter with Megan- 1988

Matching dresses (made by my Momma)- 1989

So, what do you guys think???  {Please be nice!!}  Do you want to see more?  The next decade (1990-2000) will take us through elementary school, to my high school graduation.  I have to say it was a bit hard to find 'hairstyle photos', but if the want is there, I'm sure I can come up with something.  Have a great Tuesday!!!

Rolling With The Punches

I don't know about you, but I've always been my hardest critic. When it comes to life in general (including sewing), I'm always the first one to see my mistakes.

As some of you may know, I've been out of work since the end of June 2010, with no steady architecture employment opportunities in sight, thus I've been spending my time sewing for Squirmy Worm Studio, writing patterns/tutorials, and just trying to enjoy my down time as much as possible. However, I've recently come into a period of self-doubt when it comes to growing my business, and whether or not this is the right avenue for my creativity. I would LOVE to one day be able to make a living being crafty, but I feel as there is no reality in that idea as my perfectionism takes over (plus it takes me WAY too long to start and finish a project). I let days go by without creating anything for Squirmy Worm Studio, and it frustrates me, but not knowing what people are coming to my shop for is difficult. What if I spend all of my time making adorable Nursing Cocoons when people really want to come and buy Coffee Burlap Tote Bags?

I started Squirmy Worm Studio with the hope of spreading handmade love and hope to work through the self-doubt and continue the journey, as I have tons of beautiful fabrics that I haven't yet had the opportunity to use! :)

Home Sweet Home...

I just got back from a quick trip to my home town of Bakersfield. We moved away 14 years ago, which I think technically makes Southern California my home town as I've lived here longer, but Bakersfield will always have a special place in my heart. It's weird to go back as so much has changed, yet our old house looks exactly the same (note to the new home owners...it's been 14 years and it needs to be painted!!!).

We spent our day and a half in Bakersfield running around with my second mother (aka Madre Due), and I think we successfully hit all of my favorite hot spots, including Jake's Tex-Mex (delicious pit beef), Smith's Bakery (yummy [but pricey] cookies), Dewar's (one of a kind chews...a must have!), and Strawberry Patches (where I learned how to sew!).

Now that I'm well fed, sugared up, and inspired by all of the beautiful fabrics and patterns at Strawberry Patches I need to get to sewing before my unemployment rendezvous comes to an end as I have a second interview on Monday! :)

The Handmade Marketplace

Source

For those of you who know me in real life, you know that I'm a thinker who is easily frightened by change and has a hard time making decision. Needless to say the day I lost my job my world was spinning! A short 3 months ago (a month and a half before I lost my job) I opened Squirmy Worm Studio- a place to sell handmade goodies, build friendships, and an avenue to spread handmade love. I have to say that although my business is still new, and a bit awkward at times, I am so thankful to have something to wake up to everyday (other than Live with Regis and Kelly!). ;)

I moved all of my sewing paraphernalia over to my parent's house and when I'm not looking for employment opportunities, Stuart and I go over to my parent's house to work a half a day or so in my one person sweat shop. Last night I was over at my parent's house sewing when my Momma handed me The Handmade Marketplace, by Kari Chapin.

I opened the book and the very first sentence is "Why do you create?"...which got me thinking. Personally, I sew and craft because I love seeing what I can do with my hands. I would say that sewing helps me de-stress, but that would be a big fat lie as I'm always stressing about deadlines, fabric combinations, and slightly imperfect top-stitching, but that's who I am! I grew up in a crafty household as my Momma sews, cross stitches, and did her share of shrinky dinks and puff paint when they were the in style! My little sister was always working on something whether it was a sewing project or a polymer clay figurines. I guess you can say that crafting is in my gene pool!

Why do you create?

P.S.- Keep an eye out as I'm adding a new product to my shop! I'm quite excited about the reveal! :)

Change...Not the Coins (well, kind of)!

Do you ever feel like you're standing still and life is spinning around you like a tornado? That's exactly how I've felt for the past week or so. The only way I can describe it is that it has been one ROUGH week. I mentioned last week that we are facing many changes in our daily lives, and change is not something I'm a fan of as it causes me much unneeded stress and anxiety! However I've always been a lover of change (as in coin change...did you like the transition? He he he.)! My momma tells a story that when I was a young girl (probably 2 or so) my eyes would light up when I would hear men playing with change in their pocket. There were even a few occasions where I would go and pat their pockets, as that was my code for "GIVE ME YOUR CHANGE...please!". :)

Okay, back to the regularly scheduled post! :) Last week started as a normal week; I got up everyday and went to work, until Thursday afternoon when I was given the news that my former employer could no longer afford to keep me. Although the news was not a 'shock' to me, as I survived four rounds of layoffs in the past year and a half, it is something that one cannot prepare for. I've never been a work-a-holic, as I find great pleasure in other areas of my life, however I've always been employed. I spent the summers in high school life-guarding, held internships and a retail job in college, and started my first career job a week after I graduated from college, and now here I am...spending my days looking for jobs and enjoying Stuart's company (I love the latter half...how cute is he?).


With last week's layoff, and associated consequences, I've been holding on to 1 Corinthians 10:13...

"No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he'll never let you be pushed past your limit; he'll always be there to help you come through it."

I'm well aware that there are so many other individuals and families that are dealing with some of the same trials, and please know that I'm praying for all of you!

Money In My Pocket!

I'm frugal and will be the first to admit it. I won't mention names, but I come by it honestly...it's who I am deep to the core. I love sales (especially fabric sales), don't mind using coupons, feel guilty when I buy something for me (or at full price!), and usually have buyer's remorse even for a small $10 purchase- ha!

I've been recently introduced to Hip2Save, a website hosted by a young penny-pinching mom that enjoys sharing deals, coupons, freebies, and all sorts of great stuff with her readers! Hip2Save was the source for the coupon code I used for my business cards at Overnight Prints (free 500 cards- just pay shipping!). Here's a sneak peek at my business cards...I'm in love! :)


Yesterday Hip2Save posted this Quizno's coupon which Mr. D and I used last night for dinner, and today for lunch...he he he. In today's economy you can't beat a sandwich, soda, and chips for $2.99! If you have some time, take a look at Hip2Save, as the deals are endless and it never hurts to save when you can! New deals are posted throughout the day, so you may want to schedule a morning and afternoon Hip2Save session! :)

Are you frugal, cheap, thrifty, and/or a penny-pincher? :)

Ouchy Mama!

I have some sad news to report, as this weekend proved to be quite trying for Mr. D and I. I was cutting fabric Saturday evening, to make a reusable shopping bag for ME, when the ruler slipped and the rotary blade met the side of my left index finger. Mr. D and I rushed to Urgent Care where I received 3 stitches (my first experience with stitches at the ripe ol' age of 27!). I'm able to rest in the fact that I wasn't making a 'stupid' or dangerous cut as I was just trimming the selvedge edges off; however I know that the blade was much duller than it should have been, which makes me think twice about being so frugal, as the monetary cost of this accident could have bought years (and years!) supply of rotary blades.

Every doctor I've seen since the incident reminds me how lucky I am, as it could have been much worse. I know that deep down inside, but am still upset and quite emotional. I believe I just need to come with terms with the fact that my side-less left index finger does not change the person I am, nor should I spend the rest of my life trying to hide it. I know that God has a great plan for my life and that he always has a reason. I continue to pray that he reveals his reason; until that time I have a couple of hunches as to what he wanted me to see/learn!

Thanks for listening to me, and to all of my dear family and Facebook friends, I'm sorry to repeat myself over and over! My momma tells me that I need to get back on the horse, and I know she's right. Sewing makes me happy and gifting handmade gifts makes me even happier. My sewing machine will soon meet my dining room table, but until then I'll be working on healing and accepting my newly shaped finger. Please be careful!

Snooze Fest!

Not much sewing/crafting has been going on in my house, thus not much posting has been going on here! This is the first year that I decided to gift a couple of handmade items, and I'm procrastinating like the gifts are for next Christmas- not good! For example:

• I'm working on a tote bag, in which I cut out the pattern pieces 3-4 weeks ago (plenty of time before Christmas), and the pieces are patiently waiting for me to attach the interfacing (which is not a task I enjoy!).

• I'm also working on another half apron. I picked up the project Saturday, after weeks/months of not touching it. I'm probably about a third of the way complete! I know I'll make the deadline for this one, I just have to buckle down!
  


• On a brighter note, I did finish the remaining clutches from my Christmas order! The seven clutches were delivered this morning and were well loved- which brought a smile to my face! If I've calculated correctly, I've made a total of 31 clutches since August- crazy!

As for Christmas preparations:

• All of the Christmas presents are purchased and wrapped under the tree- woo hoo!


• I sent a flat rate box to Georgia on Saturday and was notified that it was delivered today- go USPS, go! (Yes you read it right, the pajama pants and child's apron were finally sent out!)


• I'm participating in my first cookie swap with my women's small group from church on Thursday! I'm looking forward to tasting all of the cookies and bringing home the recipes (and some samples) to share with Mr. D!


• Sunday afternoon I got together with my women's small group from church and delivered food and hygiene bags to the homeless as part of our Christmas project. Yesterday was the first time I came in contact with the homeless in these circumstances, and it was definitely an eye opener. The entire time we were driving around looking for individuals to donate to, I wished that as well as the food and the hygiene products that I could have provided handmade blankets for each of them, but it wasn't in the cards this time around. I learned a lot about myself, what I take for granted, what I'm thankful for, and most of all that a stranger is able to make a difference in someone's life. Sunday was a good day!

Friday Randomness

I personally enjoy reading blogs that give you a glimpse of a person's personality. This is my attempt at giving my readers a glimpse of me, as if we were to meet in real life, I would probably come across as very much an introvert and shy (that is until I really get to know you, then I open up!). Enjoy!

Random experiences, thoughts, and happenings- a week in review:

• Mr. D and I went to Disneyland after work this week. We grabbed hamburgers (expensive, but very good and satisfying- I was impressed!) at CA Adventure, next to Soaring Over California. I would totally recommend them! The buns were nice and buttery and the toppings were serve-it-yourself-style (just like Fuddruckers- yum!).
• I'm oh so TIRED of having the elevator doors at work slammed in my face- really? I was raised to patiently wait if I heard or saw someone approaching the elevator at the same time I was. The above lesson was clearly not taught to the majority of professionals that work in my building!
• I walked outside to grab lunch and no joking its like 82 degrees outside! I don't want to jinx us Southern Californians, but it is totally earthquake weather (when its cold one day and then warms up significantly the next, one must be cautious)!
• I pondered about walking to JoAnn's at lunch today (roughly a mile each way), but due to the weather (as mentioned in the bullet above) I decided otherwise.
• I haven't turned on my sewing machine all week, which the more I think about it, the more it depresses me!
• Wednesday was the best commute home in my vanpool (yep you read it correctly- I'm a vanpooler!) career- we traveled [safely] from work to the vanpool parking lot in precisely 30 minutes! I was a happy camper! :)
• A very good friend of mine from college recently moved to Northern California, which bums me out (although he did find a job in the architecture field- which is quite amazing!).
• The jeans I'm wearing today made the trip to and from Italy (I studied abroad during college- best decision ever!), but were never actually worn on Italian soil. (TMI?)
  

Deep Breath!

Saturday I cleared off my sewing table (aka the dining room table) and stored my sewing machine, as I've been tinkering with a new medium (wood, paint, paper and Mod Podge)! The 'newness' and 'unknown' are quite exciting, and the 'ideas' seem to flow the most just as I lay my head on my pillow for the night; then comes reality and my fault of perfectionism!

Last night is not one I'm proud of! I was working with my new medium (I'll post photos upon completion), got Mr. D's approval (he determines if someone other than my family would be proud to display my handmade work in their home!) and yet kept working at it until it became a gloppy mess- ugh! I took a deep breath and proceeded to sand the painted section, to prepare to repaint and start over, yet the more I messed with the damaged piece the worse it got. It was about 11pm (way past my bedtime!) when I decided to scrap the project all together and start over- so very frustrating! To think that I had a perfect piece (in its own handmade way), a piece that would have been loved by someone for what it was, yet I kept doting on until it was wanted by no one.

Tonight is round 2- let's hope for a better outcome! :)